Category Archives: Nitpicking the Hits

Nitpicking the Hits: OneRepublic hopelessly endures the ‘Good Life’

This song somehow found its way into the top tier of the Billboard Hot 100 this summer despite the fact that it was released in 2009. As with so many things, its popularity can be traced back to the Canadian police drama Rookie Blue. Continue reading

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Nitpicking the Hits: Pitbull wants you to “Give Me Everything,” and by “everything” he means “access to your vagina””

Pitbull advises all the dudes in the club to live for the moment and find a sexual conquest to take home, echoing the famous biblical passage Isaiah 22:13 (and I’m paraphrasing here): “Eat, drink and rub your junk up against a sexy lady on the dance floor, for tomorrow we die.” Continue reading

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Nitpicking the Hits: Jeremih, 50 Cent bring club culture and rape culture together with “Down on Me”

Jeremih is simply offering to let this girl continue to put drinks on his tab. How considerate! When I saw the title to this song, I assumed it was going to be about oral sex. I guess I misjudged the gentleman. Continue reading

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Nitpicking the Hits: Black Eyed Peas “Just Can’t Get Enough” of lazy rhymes and mixed metaphors

Perhaps you have experienced the euphoria brought on by a new romantic interest. The Black Eyed Peas have cleverly likened this experience to the intoxicating and addictive qualities of a drug, a metaphorical comparison that as far as I can tell has never before been made by anyone with the exception of Ke$ha, Seal, Robert Palmer, The Beatles, Shakespeare and just about everyone else in human history. Continue reading

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Nitpicking the Hits: Jennifer Lopez and Pitbull want everyone “On the Floor”–especially you, Dale!

In this new feature, I’ll be examining the lyrics to a current Top 10 hit in excruciating detail for no reason other than to mock it. The hit: “On the Floor” by Jennifer Lopez, featuring the stylings of Miami rapper … Continue reading

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